If Liberals were a...

If liberals were a color it would be yellow (cowards)
If liberals were a dog they would be poodles (prissy sissies)
If liberals were a food they would be French snails (eeeewww)
If liberals were a wine they would be Cook's Champagne (cheap and common)
If liberals were a beer they would be wildly over-priced microbrew snob beer (yet with no taste)
If liberals were a musical, it would be Rent
If liberals were a scent, they would be the scent of sweet failure
If liberals were a show, it would be Queer Eye for the Straight Guy (telling others what to do)
If liberals were an article of clothing, it would be women's underwear
If liberals were a shoe, it would be a birkenstock
If liberals were a car, they would be hybrids
If liberals were a work of art, they would be cans of poo and Jesus in urine
If liberals were a coffee, they would be a double espresso, no-sugar vanilla, soy milk latte
If liberals were a book, they'd be Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them
If liberals were a street, they'd be a dead end
If liberals were a pasta, it would be linguini (spine)
If liberals were a family member, they would be nanny
If liberals were a fruit, they'd be bananas
If liberals were a cereal, they'd be flakes
If liberals were a holiday they'd be labor day
If liberals were a fairy tale they'd be the seven dwarves
If liberals were a slogan, they'd be "all for one, one for all, and a little bit more for me"